by Pop Vox staff
David Letterman is in trouble again, only this time Sarah Palin is not involved. He came clean last night about a series of sexual affairs he's had with younger women on his staff which have resulted in an alleged plot to extort $2 million out of him to prevent a tell-all book. The host shared all this in lieu of a Top 10, in a strangely half-comedic, half-serious monologue that ended with him mimicking his extortionist in a leprechaun voice, to loud laughter from the audience.
The only thing is, will people actually care? Absolutely not. Here are our top 10 reasons why:
10. This will give Dave and Bill O'Reilly something to talk about during their next awkward interview.
9. It's not like he was married. Letterman only got hitched seven months ago to Regina Lasko, whom he's been dating for 23 years.
8. Viagra just called. They want to sponsor his show.
7. Circus-freak syndrome: the man who joked about a Palin daughter getting down with an older Yankee has a thing for younger women getting down with older men.
6. Torrid affairs will help distinguish him from his rivals. No chance goody-two-shoes Jay Leno has a hidden sex scandal. No way girls are lining up for Conan. Who's Craig Ferguson?
5. Yep, I did have sexual relations with those women. If Bill could survive Monica, Dave will survive this.
4. The reviews are in—and the critics loved Letterman (just like they always have). "This was an extraordinary piece of television," Entertainment Weekly raved.
3. CBS is now planning a spinoff based on what happened: The Bad Husband, which will air immediately after The Good Wife.
2. Paul Shaffer gets to add another line to his résumé: actor, musician, and wingman. Triple threat!
1. Even his mom is okay with it. She told the New York Daily News that she was "looking forward to seeing the show to see what he has to say," earlier yesterday. What can you say after that?
