The Revolution Will Not Be Digitized

Leaving Las Vegas

Brian Braiker — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 22:11:16 GMT

Well that about wraps it up for me, your deflowered CES correspondent. I have a flight to catch in a couple hours, which is about how long the cab lines are around here. It's been complete gadget madness. Tech overload. It's hard to say that I have any favorites--I've looked at everything from refrigerators to televisions to robots to porn--and I'm still trying to process it all. I'll let the pros prognosticate on what the hits and the duds will be. But I have heard grumblings among my fellow reporters (and even exhibitors): There was no big story this year. No home run. No major hit. CES is just too big, they complain. Exhibitors are frustrated because it's hard to stand out in this crowd. Unless you've got a freakshow of a gadget (150-inch screen, anyone?), there's no way you're going to gin up any major buzz. I don't have anything to compare this year's show to since it is my first time, but there does seem to be this undercurrent of disappointment. People are vaguely underwhelmed--and exhausted.

Maybe they're jaded, but I certainly saw some pretty neat stuff here. Some people who come to CES year in and year out may have lost the view of the forest for all those high-tech trees. Just as you don't see yourself age when you look in the mirror every day, you tend to forget that technological evolution is grinding ever onward: geek guru Robert Scoble mentioned offhand that he remembers when he couldn't even make a cell phone call from the floor--and now folks are streaming high definition video. That sounds like a pretty great story to me.

And now I've got a plane to board. I can't wait to settle in and spend some quality time with one of the lowest-tech items on earth: a book.

The Wu Tang Clan--nay, the Voltron!--of Gadgets

Brian Braiker — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 20:38:28 GMT

What is it?
The BUG.

How much will it cost me?
$349 (although there is an "early adopter" price of $299)

Who makes it?
Bug Labs

Why should I care?
You can invent your own gadget. How cool is that?

How would you describe it?
BUG is a collection of palm-sized modules that snap together to build any gadget you can imagine--like Voltron. Each module is it's own individual gadget: there's a BUG camera, a GPS device, a keyboard, video output and so on. Where it gets mindbendingly neato is that you can attach up to four of them at a time onto the "BUGbase," which is essentially a programmable computer (Linux, for those of you keeping score at home). The individual modules now work in concert. So if, for example, you plug the GPS device and the camera into the base, you have created a toy that can automatically publish geo-tagged photos online (think Google Street View). Swap out the GPS device for the LCD screen and you have a web cam or can publish photos live to Flickr. Stick on a motion detector and you have programmable home security -- it senses movement, snaps a pic and e-mails it to you. The list of various permutations goes on.

When can I get my hands on it?
January 21

Your verdict?
Manna of the geeks

I, For One, Welcome My New Robot Overlords

Brian Braiker — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 20:11:31 GMT

What is it?
A new line of interactive robots

How much will it cost me?
$100-$300, depending on the model.

Who makes it?
WowWee

Why should I care?
Because they're robots! Befriend them now before they enslave us all.

How would you describe it?
Mr. Personality has a color LCD screen where his face ought to be. It tells jokes, plays games, and has a personality you can reprogram through a USB connection. If the writer's strike is still underway by the time Mr. Personality hits the market this summer, you'll be happy to plunk down the $250.

The three-wheeling Tri-Bot also yukks it up--at half the price ($100)--with eyebrows that jag up and down as he tells his goofy jokes. He also plays games that require you to maneuver him in certain patterns. The Tri-Bot takes a page out of the Wii playbook: you steer him with a motion-sensitive remote control that that you simply tilt from side to side.

Also slated for release this summer is the Femisapien, the voluptuous fembot. At just $100, she'll be marketed to women and girls--especially women and girls who dig wicked bellbottoms, platform shoes and Daft Punk. She responds to voice commands and even dances when she hears music.

Slightly more sinister looking--and definitely much cooler--is the Rovio ($300), a surveillance bot with a video camera, microphone, and Wi-Fi capabilities. The three-wheeled Rovio can stream video from its camera to remote locations with a broadband-connected Windows PC or smartphone. Unfortunately it's not invisible, so it's unlikely your mark won't notice he's being spied on.

When can I get my hands on it?
The full line of robots will be on sale by late summer.

What's your verdict?
Good clean pointless fun.

A Fridge That's Super Cool

Brian Braiker — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 18:57:11 GMT

What is it?

The Central Park Refrigerator.

How much will it cost me?

1,999, not including accessories.

Who makes it?

Whirlpool

Why should I care?

Because this fridge stores much more than food.

How would you describe it?

The stainless steel fridge comes equipped with an accessory port hidden on top of the freezer door. Whirlpool has teamed with partners to make gizmos that slide stylishly onto the face of the fridge. On display at CES was a digital picture frame ($249), an iPod dock, a back-lit white board that doesn't stain, and a fully-functioning tablet PC (pricing not yet available on these items). Each accessory is about the size of an atlas and is powered by the fridge.

The Clio Vu, the touchscreen 512 MG tablet PC made by Data Evolution, is super cool -- it pops out of its docking station and folds open to reveal a keyboard. It syncs with Outlook and connects wireless to the Web so it can stream videos and access e-mails. Perfect for storing recipes, grocery lists and your calendar. The Ceiva snap-on picture frame is great because magnets don't work on stainless steel fridges and ... well, when was the last time you printed out a photo anyway? Now you can slide a memory stick into the frame and treat yourself to a slide show of your latest pictures. Better yet: post a photo of yourself in your fat pants to dissuade you from that midnight snack.

When can I get my hands on it?

Now.

What's your verdict?

Very, very cool. But at two grand per fridge, not counting the cost of accessories, it might make sense wait until the technology is refined--and proves that it's here to stay.

The Sin in Sin City ... and the Low-Brow in High-Def

Brian Braiker — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 23:12:02 GMT

Today in breaking Vegas news: the Adult Entertainment Expo has kicked off in earnest, if you can use that word to describe anything the adult industry does. The porn show and the gadget show usually occur concurrently, planets in parallel orbit, peeking at each other from a safe distance. The vast majority of CES's show space is at the Las Vegas Convention Center. But there is a fairly large number of exhibitors located a quick bus ride across town at the Sands Hotel. As it happens, the Adult Expo is also being held at the Sands hotel this year--and by a delicious twist of fate, about 100 yards away from the "Sandbox Summit" for child-friendly technology. Ah, Vegas, you saucy minx of a party hostess you.

In the interest of, uh, hard news, I finagled myself an Adult Expo press pass and sauntered around the exhibition space (and boy howdy, do these people ever live up to their status as official "exhibitors"). Now this is a family CES blog, so I am going to really try to keep things relevant here. As I sauntered around the floor, failing utterly to not look completely awkward, I saw just as many flat screen TVs on display as there are scattered about CES. And, weirdly, I kept noticing signs for HD-DVD. Two thoughts instantly occurred to me:

1. I wonder if Warner Bros.'s recent decision to go with Blu-ray is going to have ripples through the porn world. And ...
2. High-definition porn? Eeeew.

A year ago, some media folks were inclined to think that porn was going to be the deciding factor in the high-def format wars. This, of course, assumed the industry was as big--and therefore as influential--as it claims to be, which it probably isn't. (When VHS beat Betamax as the dominant home video tape format, one theory was that Betamax lost because porn cast the deciding vote for VHS--also probably not true.)

Now that Warner Bros. has chosen sides in the latest format war, it seems likely that Blu-ray will emerge the dominant technology. But here in the Hustler booth is a big HD-DVD sign. I asked Drew Rosenfeld, Hustler Video Group's creative director, if he now regretted having apparently cast his lot with HD. "At this point, we're thinking of shifting gears and going completely Blu-ray," he says. The industry has been reluctant to fully embrace Blu-ray, he says, because it's more difficult and expensive to replicate (that is, to put the content onto disc). Hustler has so far released one DVD on the format, he says, and they've had to have the discs replicated in Taiwan--a hotbed of piracy, which is a massive scourge on the industry. He anticipates releasing "a full range of Blu-ray products" by mid-year.

Bruce Whitney at Adam & Eve Pictures says his company has been slow to jump into the high definition market precisely because there wasn't yet a single dominant format. "We've been unsure how the high-definition market is going to work out," he says. The company, which also had a few HD-DVD logos up in its booth, has released four titles on HD-DVD and none on Blu-ray (the first Blu-ray release won't come before May, says Whitney).

In this way, Adam & Eve is part of a broader industry trend, says Justin Bourne, an associate editor at Adult Video News, the trade publication that sponsors the Expo. "I think, just to be safe, the industry is going both ways," he says with no trace of irony. "[Warner Bros.] will have an effect, but I don't think it's going to happen for a while."

The old aphorism is that porn peddlers are the earliest of high tech adopters (also seen at the Expo: a vibrator that plugs into your iPod and buzzes in rhythm). But this time around the adult industry needs to take the same wait-and-see approach the rest of us do. Fortunately for them they know a thing or two about staying power.

Provoqative

Brian Braiker — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 17:56:11 GMT

"We believe the future of automobiles is bright and electronic." So said GM CEO Rick Wagoner last night at his keynote address, the first such speech delivered by a Detroit chief at CES. To prove his point, he unveiled its new hydrogen-powered Cadillac Provoq--certainly one of the biggest pieces of hardware to debut in Vegas this week. Good thing there are so many hydrogen refueling stations in this country! Oh, wait ...

Like the Chevy Volt, the Provoq would run on GM's new "E-Flex" architecture. It won't be ready for several years, but the Provoq, with its fuel cell stacks and lithium ion battery pack, is certainly an exciting prospect as fuel prices hover at the $100-per-barrel mark. It could also be the first zero-emission luxury car, running up to about 100 mph and emitting only water vapor. And yet. What Wagoner neglected to mention is that hydrogen fuel is made by reforming natural gas, a process which releases CO². Not so efficient ... or, for that matter, green.

Wall of Sound and Fury

Brian Braiker — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 23:53:26 GMT

Yesterday, the first official day of CES, kicked off with a bunch of announcements from Panasonic President Toshihiro Sakamoto. Chief among them is the 150-inch plasma--which the company is calling the "Life Screen," probably because that sounds better than the "Life Savings Screen"--the largest plasma screen in the world. Although there was no official word from Panasonic, analysts have predicted the TV could go for as much as $100,000. For those of you keeping score at home (and actually know what this stuff means), the TV has 2,000-by-4,000 pixel resolution. It is 11 feet wide. Which is the size of nine 50-inch plasma TVs.

I finally got a look at it today. Here you go:

I included the guy standing in front of the TV in order to give you some perspective as to how freakishly large this thing is. He's 15 feet tall. That cocked thumb alone is the size of a VW Beetle. And yet he is dwarfed--dwarfed!--by the Monster TV. If, for some reason, the screen were to topple over it would kill everyone in Las Vegas. Let us pray that it does not.

As I mentioned in passing before, the only TV I own is a 30 year-old cathode ray dinosaur that runs on diesel fuel. It's sitting on the floor in my house, not even plugged in. I can't lift it up to put it on our coffee table. Years of not watching TV, I've concluded, have made me a better person than you. And yet. Looking at this plasma leviathan, I have only one thought: Daddy want.

Vegas is Funny

Brian Braiker — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 23:50:42 GMT

So I'm staying in the Las Vegas Hilton, which is directly across the street from the convention center. To get from my 7th-floor far-east-wing room to the center of the action, I only have to walk 12 miles. You see a lot of stuff on that journey--slot machine zombies, frozen in time; some fairly righteous facial hair; despair. By far the most excellent thing I've noticed so far is the Las Vegas Hilton Barry Manilow gift shop.

The Hilton, of course, is where Fat Elvis performed 837 consecutive sold-out shows, performing before a cumulative 2.5 million people. The Vegas Hilton is the site of greatness! The King's castle!

And now, well, there's this:

Yes, that is a fridge stocked to bursting with Barry brand agua. Refresh. Re-hydrate. Manilow. I don't know about you, but nothing evokes the quenching power of cool, fresh mountain spring water like the He Who Writes the Songs. Drink deep of Manilow, America. Savor his essence. I know I will.

I'm Sorry, Dave, I'm Afraid I Can't Let You (Directly) Buy That: D.A.V.E. Portable Media Server

N'Gai Croal — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 20:28:39 GMT

Seagate's D.A.V.E., pictured on the right

What is it?

D.A.V.E. (Digital Audio Video Experience) Platform

How much will it cost me?

To be announced, but the rumor mill claims under $200.

Who makes it?

Seagate.

Why should I care?

It's a portable hard drive that connects wirelessly to a slew of devices--perfect for those memory-starved iPhones.

How would you describe it?

When I first saw D.A.V.E. at hard drive manufacturer Seagate's fall press tour in New York City, they didn't have a working model to show me. Now they do, and it's one of the subtly coolest things we've seen at CES 2008. It's a 60 gigabyte hard drive with built-in Bluetooth 2.0 and Wi-Fi, a Web server, and DLNA (Digital Living Network Alliance) support. What that means in plain English is that you can store a vast amount of content on the drive--data, photos, music, movies--then easily access it on your mobile phone, iPhone, PDA, laptop, TV or Playstation 3 that supports Bluetooth or Wi-Fi. The demo I saw showed D.A.V.E. working in conjunction with both an iPod Touch (pictured above) and a car stereo, and it was sweet to be able to play a movie or listen to a song stored on a separate device without needing a wire (though if necessary, there is a mini-USB connector). Even better, multiple devices can access different files--or the same file--simultaneously.

What's confusing me is that Seagate currently has no plans to offer D.A.V.E. directly to consumers, even through its own Web site. Instead, it will be teaming up with companies like Harman/Becker for car stereo systems; PortoMedia for selling digital movies, TV and music at kiosks; and Sanyo for use with its camcorders. I can't for the life of me believe that retailers would turn away this product or that it couldn't at least sell D.A.V.E. directly through its site, because all it would take is a couple of video clips of this gadget in action and geeks would be lining up to score one--especially iPhone users. Nevertheless, Seagate execs are sticking to their guns on this strategy, but I hope they'll change their minds.

When can I get my hands on it?

Last quarter of 2008.

What's your verdict?

Buy...if only Seagate would sell it to you directly.

Wookin' Pa Nub

Brian Braiker — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 19:03:11 GMT

You would think the press room at the Consumer Electronics Show would have some pretty tech-savvy reporters in it. Well, you'd be right. But you'd also be surprised at how dumb they can be.

I was typing an email on one of the eleventy thousand laptops available in the corral and I thought I had properly hit Ctrl-C to copy a chunk of text. When I hit Ctrl-V, something very different popped up on my screen: a personal ad, complete with an email address. Apparently the person who had been on this computer before me had been dabbling in some extracurricular computer time--and neglected to cover her tracks. Unfortunately nothing too scandalous was involved. To wit:

If you had three wishes, what would they be?: 1. Good health for myself and my family. 2. The resources to continue to travel for the rest of my life. 3. A husband and 1-2 kids.

Well, now! As it happens, I am a husband with exactly 1-2 kids. Maybe I should get in touch?

Describe an interest you have that you would truly hope your partner could share with you.: Entertaining. Nothing makes me happier than filling my house with friends, good food, and good drinks. I would want a partner that enjoyed the same.

Oh, maybe not. I hate good food and good drinks. And especially my friends.

Personal ads are boring! Let's see what's going on over at good old dependably sleazy Craigslist. What do you think you get when you navigate on over to the "casual encounters" section and type in the search term "CES"? Let's find out ...

Oh my! Nothing you should be reading at work, that's for sure.

Airing It Out

Brian Braiker — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 18:48:08 GMT

What is it?
The Guitar Hero Air Guitar Rocker

How much will it cost me?
$30 suggested retail price

Who makes it?
Jada Toys, Inc.

Why should I care?
Because the air guitar is as integral to rock as stairways are to heaven.

How would you describe it?
Strap on the Air Guitar belt buckle and unleash your inner rock demon. By waving a guitar pick over a mini amplifier attached to your belt, you can "play" songs by coordinating the tempo at which you move your hand. Simply strum the air and the amp crunches out a righteous power chord. It's up to you strum in time ... and, unless you happen to be Slash, look like a moron. It comes loaded with 10 guitar riffs, ranging in skill level from 1-5, including Black Sabbath's "Iron Man," Deep Purple's "Smoke on the Water," Motorhead's "Ace of Spades," Van Halen's "You Really Got Me", Boston's "More Than a Feeling," and five original Air Guitar Rocker freestyle riffs. Perfect for parties, especially when you're too wasted to play the actual Guitar Hero.

When can I get my hands on it?
Mosh. Uh, sorry. March.

What's your verdict?
More than a feeling: go forth and shred

A Reporter’s Day at CES

Steven Levy — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 18:03:33 GMT

Times approximate

7:00 A.M.: Send report of last night’s Bill Gates keynote to editors.

7:50: Walk out of hotel, get in endless cab line. One cab pulls up five minutes later, two people get in. Valet asks if anyone wants to go to the Convention Center and share the cab. People on line, mostly Japanese convention-goers, are frozen. New York City instincts kicking in, I leap forward.

8:15: Arrive at Convention Center for Sony Pictures Television breakfast. Look at Sony booth while coffee is being set up. Admire the new super-bright OLED TV’s, which, with 11-inch screen and fingernail-thin width, are like cufflinks compared to 150 inches of high-def screen elsewhere on the floor.

8:30: Talk to executive for a very big company that’s on top of the world who used to work for a very big company whose good fortunes have turned rotten. Hear devastating stories about the former company and interesting insights on his current employer. It will probably be the best conversation of the week.

9:30: Sony Presentation for Sony Pictures Television opens with introduction by Vanna White, then has Alex Trebek (looking good after heart attack) chatting with Steve Mosko, head of the division. He introduces a digital service with content in 4-minute bursts, cut out of full-size dramas and Seinfeld episodes. Jerry Seinfeld appears, does 15 minutes of jokes about toiles and commercials--but very funny. Tony Bennett comes out and sings a song.

10:30: Struggle with iPhone to get it to resend file I sent in early morning, which didn’t go through.

11:00: Go to “Industry Insider” speech by Chief Yahoo Jerry Yang. Before he takes the stage there are slides of “fun facts” about Yahoo, all of which have to do with its huge user base, like telling how many times Yahoo users would circle the earth if they were arranged around the equator (three). He shows new mobile software.

Noon: Go to Microsoft press building (a separate structure outside the hall) to interview Chief Technical Officer Craig Mundie supposedly over lunch. There are boxed lunches in a waiting area, but I don’t take one, figuring we’ll have food inside. There isn’t. PR person asks if he could tape the interview. I say OK, and take out my own recorder. Brief discussion on how great digital tape recorders are.

12:03 P.M.: My tape recorder stops. Screen says “low battery.”

12:05: Microsoft PR guy has extra batteries, so interview resumes. Discussion of spectrum auction, Microsoft’s impact on consumer electronics, Bill Gates’ departure, and personality of One Laptop Per Child leader Nicholas Negroponte.

1:00: Food outside the interview rooms is gone. I go to press room where there is a long line for the lunches provided reporters. Someone calls out, “There’s only rice and beans.” Go into a room full of computers to do email.

1:10: Internet goes down in press room.

1:20: Walk around some of the 1.7 square feet of exhibition space. Lots of noise and big TVs.

2:00: Take Las Vegas Monorail back to hotel and eat lunch in a facsimile of a Paris bistro under a fake twilight sky.

3:00: Internet in hotel room.

3:20: Get email from a Microsoft PR person. I left my tape recorder on the table there.

4:00: Walk to Venetian Hotel for meeting and press conference. Sidewalks lined with people passing out cards for “Girls Direct to your Room in 20 minutes.”

4:30: Interview Ron Sanders, head of Warner Brothers Home Video, the guy who just stuck a dagger in the heart of the HD-DVD hi-def format fight by announcing that his company--the biggest studio in home video--would support Blu-Ray exclusively. (Previously Warners was the only studio supporting both formats.) He says he was just following the consumer, who is buying Blu-Ray two-to-one.

5:00: Press conference of Blu-Ray consortium, with Sanders and reps from other studios promoting the format, is an hour-long gloat-fest. Old message: We’re better than HD-DVD. New message: Now that format war is over, we must “educate” consumers to buy new players and the more expensive disks.

6:00: Almost get killed crossing the street to the Wynn. Attend ShowStoppers, a show-within-a-show with more than 100 companies presenting new stuff. See an air-guitar variation on Guitar Hero, test a Wi-Fi picture frame, taste beer made from BeerTender, a Krups product that taps a keg of Heineken. Interviewed twice by different people on Podcast Network. Run out of business cards.

8:45: Decision time--there are two parties at the Palms (Intel and Digital Freedom party sponsored by Consumer Electronics Association), and a Sony party at some hotel I’m staying at. Ponder this while waiting in cab line with a friend who’s going to the Palms.

9:30: Get to head of cab line. Decide to go back to hotel.

10:15: Sony “After Hours” party is happily low key, with three-piece acoustic band playing classic rock covers. Talk to a few people--“See anything new?” “Not really”--and get a brew from a bartender, not a BeerTender. Someone asks the band to play “Free Bird.”

11:15: Back to room. Email. Sleep.

Descending into the Rabbit Hole

Brian Braiker — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 20:31:35 GMT

This place is overwhelming. You've heard the stats, but they bear repeating: 2700+ exhibitors, 1.8 million square feet of floor space, 140,000 attendees, one too many Germans. I've been ambling around for the past couple of hours and I've only seen the bulk of one hall (there are three at the Convention Center alone, not counting the various other CES-related displays and events scattered throughout town). I'm not complaining, really, it's all very shiny and flashy. But you have to feel sorry for the exhibitors—how do you stand out in an environment like this? I saw a photo-editing display set up next to a high-tech sewing machine display. CES: daring to take Bedazzled into the 21st century! Too much ... technology ... having ... seizures. People are trying really hard to differentiate themselves. There are lots and lots of scantily clad and heavily made-up ladies—tech tarts!—who leap out at you and want to know "Are you sick of listening to your voicemail?!" (Not if it's from you, hotpants --Ed.). It all smacks of desperation a little.

By far the best thing I've seen so far was a display that involved a performance by a hip hop trio that called itself The Hip Hop Opera. At first I was skeptical (I was, after all, on my way to track down Chuck D, a true godfather, whose appearance here may be evidence that he is no longer fighting the power. I would later learn he is in the South Hall ... of a different hotel.) The Hip Hop Opera is fronted by a guy who goes by Supernatural and who claims to hold the world record for longest free style rap. A quick search on the Internets bears this out. First he introduces his beat box buddy who does a dazzling display of expectorational pyrotechnics, replete with Grandmaster Flash and Afrika Bambaataa quotes. It would have made Dough E. Fresh proud. It would have brought tears to Rahzel's eyes. Then Supernatural himself grabbed the mic, encouraging the ever-ballooning audience to pull anything they had had out of their pockets. Dude masterfully incorporated everything into his rhymes for a good 20 minutes: Bluetooth, aluminum trinkets, mirror, keys, a crochet needle. Here he is in action (pardon my Blackberry photo-taking non-abilities):

It was a masterful display and it would have gotten me curious about any product that had his support. The only problem: I have no idea what product he was there to support.

Where We Get Our News: Strippers and Cabbies

Brian Braiker — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 18:02:34 GMT

It's a cliche reportorial trick, but a tested one: When you get to a new city, chat up your friendly cab driver. You always learn a little dirt, get a little flavor. (A fellow reporter once told me the same holds true for strippers -- of course, I wouldn't know. What? Why are you looking at me like that? Don't you believe me?) I've been to Vegas four or five times in the past (this is my first time here for work) and I always learn something new from the cab drivers. Like for example: they absolutely hate CES. Can you blame them? Some 140,000 technophiles flood the city, don't really gamble or drink to excess and leave, I am told, lousy tips. Now they have one more reason to be grumpy: competition. This year they're putting hundreds of additional cabs on the streets during CES (and that other convention). They're also having drivers work shifts of up to 12 hours, which doesn't seem entirely safe. I haven't been able to hammer down a specific number, but one cab driver told me there would be 800 additional taxis; another cabbie told me 500. These guys would make lousy fact checkers. Still, I was curious enough to Google around a bit and found the Las Vegas taxi driver blog, which has this fairly hilarious post about the CES demanding that the taxicab authority put 300 more cars into circulation. Key quote:

"CES is basically a show where juvenile geek’s from all the Globalist hot spots gather in Las Vegas to look at the latest gizmos nobody needs but are convinced they cannot live without.

Don’t expect any earth changing technology to flow from this latest GeekFest. Back in the late 1990’s when the Global Elite figured out the Internet truly could threaten their grip on World Dominance, they have worked mightily to insure the bandwidth never showed up which could have truly diversified Power to all Peoples of the World."

OK, a little batty. Still. Whether there are 300, 500 or 800 more cabs on the road this week is immaterial. It all boils down to one thing for my taxi-driving friends in this fairly astute and poetic conclusion:

"So in a nutshell CES and the Taxi Business are similar. Too many apps--too many cabs, and far too few roads and access points to make proper use of."

A Luddite Goes to CES

Brian Braiker — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 18:00:32 GMT

The good people at Newsweek have seen it fit to send not one, not two, but three people from New York to Vegas this year. There's Steven Levy who has been writing books on technology since I was in fourth grade. There's N'Gai Croal whose knowledge of games and gadgets will leave you gasping in incomprehension approximately 6 seconds after you ask him "What are you looking forward to at CES?" Then there's, well, me. One of my prized posessions is a record player; my only television is sitting in a closet collecting dust. Forget about asking me the difference between Blu-ray and HD-DVD technologies. I am typing this blog entry from the press room at the Las Vegas Convention Center becuase I couldn't make my laptop go online from my hotel room. Which is fine because I forgot to bring my laptop's charger with me anyway.

So I'm the third man here at CES. You've got two of the best technology reporters working today, both of whom have their own Wikipedia entries. And you have me, a daddy blogger who, incidentally, can't seem to shake the stomach flu he woke up with yesterday, courtesy of his daughter. Obviously I'm not going to beat any lifetime beat reporters at their own beat. But I am a reporter, so with a little luck I'll be able to figure out which are the right questions to ask the right people. I'll be the advocate for the poor schlub who still pines for Betamax; the guy who gave up after Apple's Newton let him down.

And as a former arts editor, I'll be delving deep into the cultural significance of CES. For example: in breaking technology news I've learned that Chuck D is manning a booth here! Awesome! And Kevin Costner's band is playing later today. Rock on, Bodyguard! And did you know that there's a shadow convention going on this week as well? As it does every year, the Adult Entertainment Expo is, uh, going down simultaneously on the other side of the, er, strip. Hilarious! Aren't geeks the core consumers of porn? Isn't this some perfect storm of conventiony goodnes? You can bet I'll be putting my Luddite reportorial chops to work on this important CES story.