(Photo from LisaNH on Flickr)
Talk about symbolic overkill. When Barack Obama's press office announced yesterday that Obama and Hillary Clinton would hold their first joint rally this Friday in "Unity, New
Hampshire," where "both candidates received exactly 107 votes... in the primary," I reflexively sought out the most convenient wall to bang my head against. Apparently, wrote the New Republic's Christopher Orr, "the rivals were unable to find venues with
appropriate seating in Help Retire My Debt, Penn., or You Should've
Dropped Out In March, Fla." He forgot about I Still Won the Popular Vote, Ohio and Lady, It Was a Race for Delegates, Mich., but otherwise, my feelings exactly.
But then I got to thinking: Bill Clinton has been awfully quiet since Obama won the nomination. Actually, except for a one-sentence, secondhand endorsement issued today--"President Clinton is obviously committed to doing whatever he can and
is asked to do to ensure Senator Obama is the next president of the
United States," said a spokesman--he hasn't said or done anything at all. Of course, the most recent Democratic president can't exactly sit out The Most Important Election of Our Lifetimes ®, so he's going to have to sack up and hit the trail for the Obama sometime soon. The question then become, which town will set the right tone for Bill and Barack's first joint appearance?
The most obvious pick is probably Bill's birthplace of Hope, Ark.; like Clinton circa 1992, Obama likes to say the word hope a lot. But that might be drifting too far onto Bill's turf. If so, Obama should suggest the swing-state towns of New Hope, Penn.and Little Hope, Wisc. instead. That said, the whole hope thing might be a little overhyped. For other uplifting options, we'd probably try Progress, Ore.; New Era, Penn.; Presidential, Conn.; Democrat, Idaho; Opportunity, Mont.; or Forty Four, Ark. Friendship, Okla. is acceptable, if cheesy. Brothers, Ill. could work. But Manlove, Calif.? Perhaps a bit too much.
In fact, there may be more restricted territory than open terrain. Bill, for example, will probably want to skip Cheat Lake, W.Va., Intercourse, Penn. and Horneytown, N.C. Likewise, Obama should avoid Bitter End, Tenn. Recalling his famous critique of Obama's bid, Bill could suggest Fairyland, Tenn., but I doubt his new partner would accept; same goes for Bill and the plausible Obama destination of Jerktail, Missouri. And while Bigfoot, Texas might be accurate, it's not exactly the message anyone wants to send at this point.
So where to go? My personal favorite is a tiny historical village in Coshocton County, Ohio. It's in a swing state. It leaves even less to the imagination than Unity, N.H. And it pays tribute to the person responsible for bringing Bill and Barack together. Its name:
White Womans Town.
Hope you have a wall handy.
