Newsweek
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Nov 24, 2009 02:53 PM
By Jerry Adler
1. Survivor: Thanksgiving
We gather together, to ask the Lord’s blessing—
We need it more than ever, as the Lord only knows.
Aunt Sally’s growing odder, her behavior is distressing.
She drank up all the sherry and took off her clothes.
Safe from harm and trouble, our gratitude expressing
Our triumph is nearing, we soon will prevail.
Except for poor young Harry, who seems to be regressing.
He says that he won’t eat till his dad’s out on bail.
Warming by the fire, hearts and souls possessing
The fullness of friendship to lighten the gloom.
No worries that are pressing, we spend our time in guessing
Who’s getting divorced and who’s sleeping with whom.
Then gather at the table, with turkey and with dressing
And Maura with her tofu, her brown rice and kale.
Sobbing in her napkin to see us so oppressing
Our fellow creatures, we should all be in jail.
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