Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama aren't the only presidential wannabes caught up in a war of words. On the GOP side, there's a nasty catfight brewing between Mitt Romney and- Sam Brownback? The Kansas senator and longshot presidential hopeful has played it nice on the campaign trail to date. But as pressure to break out of the pack or pack it in intensifies, Brownback has gone on the attack in recent weeks, repeatedly questioning Romney's conservative credentials on everything from agriculture policies to abortion.

Two weeks ago, Brownback issued a snarky (at least for him) press release proposing a new word for the dictionary: "Mitt-amorphasis." (Get it?) Brownback's definition: "A self-directed and self-contradictory cyclical process, occurring in even-numbered years, by which a Massachusetts politician transforms at will." Among the word's proposed synonyms, according to the Brownback campaign, was "John Kerry." Zing! Romney's camp did what anyone regarded as a first-tier presidential contender would do: They largely ignored the attacks. But that didn't stop Brownback, who has since issued at least two releases a week attacking Romney's "ocean of contradiction." Earlier this week, Brownback upped the ante, paying for a series of automated phone calls to Iowa voters questioning Romney's stance on abortion. "Mitt Romney is telling Iowans he is firmly pro-life," the message says, according to AP. "Nothing could be further from the truth." Among other things, the message mentions that Romney's wife, Ann, "has contributed money to Planned Parenthood." Calling the calls "despicable," Romney's campaign called on Brownback to apologize. (Brownback's campaign also paid for calls questioning fellow longshot Tom Tancredo's abortion position.)

Why is Brownback going negative? It's simple: The much-hyped Ames straw poll is a little over two weeks away, and Brownback needs to win if his long-shot presidential campaign has any chance of moving forward. With Rudy Giuliani, John McCain and non-candidate Fred Thompson all down as no-shows, Romney is considered Brownback's biggest competition.

But calling Romney a flip-flopper isn't the Kansas senator's only avenue of attack. Last week, in between slaps at Romney, Brownback's campaign announced it had hired Famous Dave's BBQ to cater its tent at the straw poll. "We can't wait to enjoy Famous Dave's pulled pork BBQ," a campaign spokesman declared. Your Gaggler must admit that Brownback's barbecue news release was a wonder--working in essential mentions like how President Bush used Famous Dave's back in 2000 and how the chain was named "Best BBQ" in Des Moines last year. Oh, and by the way, it manages to mention that Brownback is pro-life. "Sen. Brownback recently joined Bobby Schindler, brother of the late Terri Schiavo, to speak to grassroots supporters and outline his 'pro-life, whole-life' vision that values the child in Darfur as much as the child in the womb," the release concluded. Sadly, there was no mention of how Brownback comes down on the great rib debate. Wet or dry? We'll have to wait until Ames to find out.