Unless you’ve been in solitary confinement, you’re aware of the fact that Belle de Jour, blogger, former prostitute, and head of the Diary of a London Call Girl publishing empire has revealed herself to be Dr. Brooke Magnanti, research scientist at the Bristol Initiative for Research of Child Health.

When she’s not blogging about her past sexploits, she using her Ph.D. in informatics, epidemiology, and forensic science to research the effects of pesticides on children.  How’s that for an unexpected spin on the whore-with-the-heart-of-gold theme?  I’m kinda jealous of her, I have to admit.  Magnanti is like a year of feminist studies rolled into one.  I would have loved to be the first credible candidate for one of feminism’s holy grails:  the empowered sex worker—able to expose herself to patriarchal fantasies of male domination without becoming damaged goods. 

We may have to add her to our pantheon of saints right up there with Susan Faludi and Katha Pollitt. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a more level-headed and reasonable explanation for becoming a call-girl than this one by Magnanti:

“I couldn’t find a professional job in my chosen field because I didn’t have my Ph.D. yet. I didn’t have a lot of spare time on my hands because I was still making corrections and preparing for the viva; and I got through my savings a lot faster than I thought I would. … What can I do that I can start doing straightaway, that doesn’t require a great deal of training or investment to get started, that’s cash in hand and that leaves me spare time to do my work in?”

Is this woman a scientist or what?  Now before you go all ballistic and chastise either myself or Dr. Magnanti for our lack of moral fiber, let me add two things:  working as an escort is not illegal in the United Kingdom.  Yup, prostitution is above board in England—it’s the activities that make sex work a nasty dangerous enterprise that are illegal—no streetwalking, no pimps, no brothels.  Secondly, the idea that prostitution is the only commodified form of erotic activity is crazy.  Consider the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition for a moment—$6.99 and all you get is the illusion of female sexuality.  Magnanti may well be the rare woman who can, as Gloria Steinem put it to Vermont Woman, “experience sexuality as power.…It’s not sexuality that’s the problem, it’s whose sexuality and why?”  That’s also why I can love Belle de Jour and still condemn human trafficking, the prostitution of children, and pimping without appearing hypocritical or naive.

And lest you think I dodged the whole morality question, let me answer in more detail by punting to a smarter mind.  In Feminist Issues in Prostitution, Sarah Bromberg asserts that our stern disapproval of call girls stems “from an underlying assumption in conventional morality that involvement in prostitution will “necessarily” have degenerative effects on a person leading her to other criminal activities.…Prostitution is not a profound condition of degeneracy and in many instances it may be a self-regarding expression of a person surviving in the best way given their skills and opportunities.”  Take that, you Puritans!

So, I’m a big fan of Dr. Magnanti now; I might even buy her new book, Belle de Jour’s Guide to Men. I have a feeling her point of view might be more interesting than the play-hard-to-get, treat-men-like-untrainable-dogs claptrap we women usually get. [As it turns out, the start of chapter one hits the "men are like untrainable dogs" metaphor pretty hard. I guess some stereotypes are hard to break, even if you're a pioneering scientist/call girl.]

by Leigh Bond

Who says that women only like jerks? A new study published in the journal Science from Binghamton University and the University of Arizona adds yet another clue to the mystery that is female sexual selection.  "Mom was right," says the press release. "Nice guys don't always finish last."

Of course, mom was probably not discussing the mating habits of bugs. Researchers in this study observed the effects of a controlled group of male water striders – both aggressive and low-key, and their sexual relations with the females in the group. According to the study led by Omar Tonsi Eldakar of the University of Arizona’s Arizona Research Laboratories, groups of “gentlemen” water striders mated with  more females than did groups of the “psychopath” suitors. The research contradicts previous laboratory studies finding sexually aggressive males more successful at reproducing, said Eldakar. In previous studies, the females were blocked from leaving the areas populated by the sexually aggressive males; this study showed that actually given a choice, the females would leave whenever the jerk bugs came around - the nice bugs got the girls.

What does this have to do with you? Almost nothing. Find out why, after the jump. 

Steve Phillips (AP Photo/Kathy Willens, File) 

Did Dave hit on me? No. Did he pay me enough extra attention that it was noted by another writer? Yes. Was I aware of rumors that Dave was having sexual relationships with female staffers? Yes. Was I aware that other high-level male employees were having sexual relationships with female staffers? Yes. Did these female staffers have access to information and wield power disproportionate to their job titles? Yes. Did that create a hostile work environment? Yes. Did I believe these female staffers were benefiting professionally from their personal relationships? Yes. Did that make me feel demeaned? Completely.

After reading Jessica Bennett's article on the why women have sex, it's clear that for everyone, men and women, our motivations go way beyond the need for love or the biological drive to reproduce. So we asked our readers to share some of their stories about sexual motivation.

Over the weekend, we'll publish some of our favorites. Submit your stories to newsweek@tumblr.com or via our Tumblr page.

Reader Submission 1:  Low Standards For Sex, Higher for Relationships

Like many teenagers I was a “loser” in high school. I had a grand total of one sexual partner at the time, in my freshman year, and he didn’t even go to my school. I didn’t love him, he was more like a friend, and I had sex with him because the opportunity was there. I suppose I was sick of feeling like a geek with no sex life to speak of. We broke it off shortly after, of course.

After turning 18, I decided to try online dating. I wanted to make certain my usual circle of buddies were not messed with. I never considered having a relationship with any of my friends because I knew it would ruin what we already had. This is why I always preferred people to start out as perfect strangers. I don’t like to put any strong emotional attachments on my sexual partners or make any official commitments. That isn’t to say that I wouldn’t want a real relationship, but I have never sensed a strong enough connection with anyone to feel ready for such a step.

Find out why this reader would rather have a hot fling than a dumb boyfriend after the jump. 

By Leigh Bond

Kat B., I have a confession: remember that time freshman year when you went home early and my boyfriend was in town so we stayed out late? We came home thankful you happened to fall asleep with music on, and that beds on cinder blocks don’t squeak. Because even though you were only a few feet away, and you could have woken up at any time … no big surprise, but we were doing it.

You were probably already clued in, as evidenced by the sheepish smiles we shot one another over our Saturday-morning dining-hall waffles. But guess what? We all got through it. Then two weeks later, when you invited an entire band to crash in our room during the fall music festival, I went with it, gladly offering up extra pillows to scrawny boys in tighty whities. Because let’s face it: (1) they were pretty cute, and (2) I owed you big. You let me being a tacky lush slide and I let you live out your indie-band groupie dreams, no strings attached.

In other words, we worked it out on our own like budding grown-ups because isn’t that the point of having a college roommate?
   
Apparently though, if I were a student this year at Tufts University, my late-night bad manners would be not only mine and Kat’s weird, blush-inducing problem, but the resident adviser's, the dorm's, and the school's: a new regulation prohibits students in dorms from having sex while their roommate is in the room.

On the surface, it's a good rule: it goes without question that having sex while your roommate desperately cranks up the iPod in the bunk above you is gross and inconsiderate. At the same time, learning to handle the situation is a vital part of growing up into a personally accountable adult. Having a surrogate parental crutch (à la the poor RA) around to finagle the situation for you equals passive immaturity at its most detrimental.

According to CNN.com, the handbook's rules on overnight guests directs students to "not engage in sexual activity while your roommate is present in the room. And sexual activity within your assigned room should not ever deprive your roommate(s) of privacy, study, or sleep time." (In other words, no "sexiling.")

That’s not unreasonable, but is it really necessary? Why not just buck up and grow up? Learn roommate ground rules early. Don’t be routinely inappropriate, and don't expect your roommate to be a paragon of moral virtue. If it becomes a recurrent, life-altering roommate problem, then address it—by calling your roommate out on her behavior and setting up a twin-bed tango schedule, not calling the campus police. Getting the university involved seems so opposite of what college is supposed to teach you: how to handle reality without a protective shield. If you can’t learn to live with quiet, awkward sex from your roommate in college, how do you deal with loud, floor-banging sex from your roommates in apartments postgrad? (It happens.)

Knowing how to stand up for yourself is an integral part of transitioning to adulthood, where even more difficult and uncomfortable situations inevitably arise. Learning when to let things slide versus when to confront a legitimate problem—while recognizing that you still have to interact every day with the source of said problem—is a skill vital to social and professional experience. Your RA can’t get you a raise when you feel you deserve one, your mom won’t be there to tell future roommates to pay for the shoes their dog ate, and your college handbook won’t have tips on how to dump your sweet-but-clingy boyfriend.

Tuft’s giggle-inducing rule isn’t even really about sex. It’s about life—stepping up to it, preparing for it, experiencing it, and creating a personal threshold of the acceptable and the intolerable. In other words, finding your own voice and using it with legitimacy, and knowing when to tell your roommate "Dude, inappropriate!" or "Girl, you owe me," or simply thinking "Hey, that’s gonna make for a funny story over breakfast tomorrow."

College is chock-full of awkward, problematic moments and weighty issues. As far as roommate relations go, if they're not having sex while you're in the room, they're probably downloading music on your computer without asking, eating your food, helping themselves to your closet, or using your toothpaste. People overstepping their bounds, taking what's yours, and thinking of their pleasure instead of your rights happens—in college, at work, in marriage, and throughout life.

The good news: no matter how tricky the problems of the real world, if you make it through dorm living, you’ll probably never have to share a narrow room with a near stranger ever again. The bad news: if you don’t learn to deal with/laugh at/change the problems that this living situation creates, if you never learn how to assert yourself, you’ll find yourself getting screwed in an entirely different way after graduation.

Kat B., I owe ya.

BOND is a student at NYU, a NEWSWEEK intern, and an occasional tacky lush. 

October is breast-cancer-awareness month, and already the country is awash in various shades of pink. But some groups have taken a more direct approach to promoting breast-cancer awareness: namely, by making us all aware of breasts. Big, bouncing, half-naked breasts.

Australia’s koalas are dying in droves of something newspapers are coyly calling a “stress disease.” You have to read down to the fourth paragraph of the Associated Press report to find out what said illness is: chlamydia. Yes, the same sexually transmitted disease you heard about in health class is killing off one of nature’s cuddliest creatures.

In humans, chlamydia is caused by a nasty bacterium called Chlamydia trachomatis. The koala version comes in two varieties: C. pneumoniae and C. pecorum. Unlike their human cousin, these bacteria often attack the respiratory system and the eyes, causing pinkeye and blindness. And like their human cousin, they damage the sex organs, leading to incontinence, scarring, and infertility in females. Sam the Koala, a YouTube sensation, suffered this fate in August—she died during surgery to remove cysts from her bladder and uterus.

Find out why the STD is worse than ever after the jump....

Now that you've had time to read Jessica Bennett's fascinating piece on women's sexual motivations, we want to hear your stories. Do you think that sex is something that should be done only when you're in love—except for that one time you wanted to get back at your ex? Are you happy to use sex just as a tool for physical release, and not attach any emotion? Have you ever used sex to get a job, get over an ex, or get validation that you rocked that bridesmaid dress? Did it do the trick, or leave you feeling you'd let yourself down? Men, have you ever had sex for reasons more complicated than you'd like to admit? Do you feel the idea that you have sex only for pleasure has led to your physical and emotional needs being ignored?

Let's be honest: the idea that men and women are on totally different planets when it comes to love and sex seems less and less likely the more we learn (and the more we talk) about our sexual motivations. And with that new understanding comes less shame, more clarity, and a better experience—in and out of the bedroom—for all of us. So let's keep talking. Send your stories of why you've had sex—for pure or less-than-pure reasons—to newsweek@tumblr.com.

Or submit them on our Tumblr page. We'll print some of the best stories (anonymously, of course) on Friday.

Update 11:45 a.m.: If you tried to submit your story and found a broken link, it's fixed. Submit your stories here.

Ok, Gleeks: we need to clear something up about last night's episode(everyone else may want to jump ahead a few paragraphs). The most preposterous thing in last night's episode of Glee,  Fox's new hit musidey (comical? song-and-dancedy?) was not the football team dancing to "Single Ladies" during the big game. It was not Sandy Ryerson's shortie kimono. No, it was sweet, hot, dumb jock Finn believing  that he got his girlfriend pregnant by kissing in a hot tub.

They didn't even take their swimsuits off! Finn sputters, though in fairness there was some  premature ejaculation.  No matter, cheerleader Quinn shrugs. "A hot tub is the perfect temperature for sperm," she says. "It helps them swim faster."

Of course, it's later shown that president of the chastity club Quinn got a little action on the side and was just trying to protect her rep and her relationship. It's true that Finn—who also learned this episode that libraries let you borrow books—probably slept through biology. But his misconception is not all that uncommon. After the show, teachers posting on online chat boards wrote that their students often had similar questions, and the internet is full of real-life Finns, trying to get the facts straight. 

Thanks in part to plan B's complicated history, there are a lot ofmyths and misunderstandings about emergency contraception. And despitethe fact that the pill has been on the market since 1999, there's stillsome confusion about how it works.

First, don't confuse Plan B,which prevents pregnancy, with RU-486, the pill used in a medicalabortion.  “They’re entirely and absolutely different,” says JamesTrussell, who directs Princeton's Office of Population Research andruns Not-2-Late, a website and hotline devoted to emergency contraception.  RU-486 contains a synthetic steroid calledmifepristone, which interferes with the body’s production of progesterone necessary to sustain pregnancy. Plan B has nothing to do withprogesterone. Instead, it inhibits or delays ovulation. Plan B It is noteffective if the process of implantation has begun.

 Buteven sex-savvy women and men who have that fact down can get confusedabout the basics of Plan B. That's why we've put together a list ofsome hard facts about how it works, how it doesn't, and what you shouldknow.

Read more after the jump.