Nice Threads: 'Gossip Girl''s Ed Westwick (left) and Taylor Momsen
James Devaney / Getty Images (left); Soul Brother-Film Magic-Getty Images

Fashion consciousness isn’t new to the schoolyard set. But with more and more TV shows about wealthy teens, like the CW network’s “Gossip Girl” and MTV’s “My Super Sweet 16” on the airwaves, parents may find themselves bombarded with an unprecedented number of requests for $140 Coach bags and $60 Abercrombie jeans. Here’s how to balance the desire to make your kids happy with the need to avoid bankruptcy.

• Ask why kids want designer duds. Usually, the motivation is to fit in or acquire social status. Christine Feiler, whose kids are 6, 9, 12 and 14, says she regularly hears: “Everyone else has it!” One strategy is to talk about alternative ways of accomplishing that same goal, says Dee Shepherd-Look, a clinical psychologist who specializes in children and families. Parents can encourage their kids to more actively call friends and organize gatherings. “Studies on adolescent popularity show that popular kids are the ones who reach out, make things happen, who tend to be complimentary to other kids,” says Shepherd-Look.

• Lay out the financial picture. If a kid begs for pricey apparel, “the parents can smile and say, ‘That would be grand, but we can’t afford it’,” says child psychiatrist Elizabeth Berger, author of “Raising Kids With Character.” Then kids will understand a “no” is “not that the parents are just being mean,” says Brad Sagarin, an associate professor of psychology at Northern Illinois University. Don’t dwell on the electric bill and the mortgage with younger kids. Instead, ask if they would give up a birthday party to buy an Abercrombie shirt.

• Set a budget. Estimate how much you spend a year on your kids’ clothes and then divide it by four (for each season) or 12 (for each month). Younger kids can be in charge of just part of the budget, and older kids can try the whole thing, says Atlanta pediatrician Jennifer Shu, editor of the American Academy of Pediatrics’ “Baby & Child Health.” Richard Ryan, a professor of psychology at the University of Rochester, gave his daughters a clothes budget when they were 10 and 8. The strategy allows kids to complain about Abercrombie’s prices instead of about “how cheap you are,” he says. For splurges, consider chipping in part of the amount and asking your kids to earn the rest.

• Beware the faux Ugg boot. Steer your kids toward affordable stores like Old Navy and H&M, but don’t force them to buy knockoffs. These days, even preschoolers can spot a pair of fake Ugg boots (nicknamed “Fuggs”) and may taunt classmates about them.

• Avoid dissing your kids’ taste. When they want as for expensive brand names, don’t say, “That’s silly,” says psychologist Lisa Medoff, author of “SOS: Stressed Out Students’ Guide to Handling Peer Pressure.” “It is a big deal to them. Don’t write it off.” Instead, say, “It’s really disappointing because it’s so expensive. It’s not in our budget.”

• Talk about TV shows and stars. Discuss how programs like “Gossip Girl,” are not meant to depict real life. “Often kids are watching it, but nobody talks to them about it,” says Northbrook, Ill., psychologist Margot Touris. Also, explain that the celebs they might see in magazines are often given clothes for free as advertising.

• Try DIY (with caution). “You want to fit in, but you want to stand out at the same time, without looking like a freak,” says Ellen Warwick, author of “Everywear” and “In-jean-uity,” which promote creative ways for kids to decorate their clothes for under $10. Among her suggestions: buy jeans at Target and add embellishments to the bottom. “The coolest kids in school are always the ones who aren’t concerned with what everyone else thinks,” says Warwick.

Finally, remember that your kids want your love more than they want fancy clothes. Stanley Goldstein, a psychologist and author of “Troubled Children/Troubled Parents,” says, “Despite what they say, the most important thing in their life is their parents.”