Illustration:Chris Gash for Newsweek
Committing to Separation: Divorce decrees increasingly include ‘disaster scenarios'

By Linda Stern
Aug. 4, 2008 issue

It’s been more than a year since Janette Chamberlin and her husband decided to divorce. To save money on lawyers, they’ve been negotiating their own settlement and are ready to draw up the papers and finalize the deal. She even has a new boyfriend. The catch? The Chamberlins still live together in their house outside Philadelphia. The couple just sold their home, and, as a result, neither has been able to afford to move out.

The economy is taking a toll on marriages, but it is tough on divorces, too. Couples can’t unload their houses for enough cash to pay off their mortgages and home-equity debts, but job losses and tougher mortgage standards make it harder to afford splitting them, too. “I’m seeing many people who lose jobs and just don’t have the money to pay their alimony and child support,” says Jill Brooke of the online community First Wives World (firstwivesworld.com). Here’s how troubled couples can extricate themselves during troubled times.

• Deal with the house. Couples can hang on to a house until the real-estate market improves, but it’s usually not a good idea, says Stacy Francis, a New York financial planner who deals with divorce issues. “You’re binding two people together financially who don’t want to be bound in any way,” and if one stops paying on the mortgage, it can cause housing and credit problems for the other. It’s better to transfer the house to one spouse, if that spouse can qualify for a mortgage on his or her own.

Couples who can’t afford to do that and find themselves “upside down”—owing more on the home than they can sell it for—are negotiating short sales, in which the bank agrees to cut the loan amount to the sale price the couple gets. Richard Zaretsky, a West Palm Beach, Fla., lawyer, says he is negotiating two or three short sales a week for divorcing couples.

By Christina Gillham
Aug. 4, 2008 issue

Years of suburban development and unsustainable gardening practices have led to vanishing wildlife populations. The National Wildlife Federation has stepped up its efforts to promote its Backyard Wildlife Habitat program, which certifies homeowners who provide friendly environments for small mammals, birds, butterflies and reptiles.

The program asks residents to raise native plants and trees, which provide animals with food and shelter, and to put out water in the form of a birdbath or small pan for birds to drink and bathe in. Homeowners should also practice sustainable gardening by reducing lawn size, removing invasive plants and keeping rain barrels to collect water that can be used in lieu of the hose. (See nwf.org/ backyard for more details.)

David Mizejewski, a naturalist at the NWF, says that the certification, which costs $15, does not have to apply to your entire property. “The idea is to create a movement to get gardeners to adopt some of these principles,” he says. And, listing your home as a certified “wildlife habitat” can’t hurt its value.

Rent “The Band’s Visit.” An Egyptian police band en route to a concert gets stranded in a remote Israeli desert town. This droll and poignant crowd-pleaser, set several decades ago, wrings fresh and unsentimental variations on themes of cross-cultural misunderstanding and reconciliation. Its understated charm is impossible to resist.

Go to Rockland, Maine, for the Maine Lobster Festival. One of New England’s premier summer events, the event (now in its 61st year) includes a lobster-crate race, a parade, kids’ activities and—did we mention?—lots of fresh Maine lobster (July 30–Aug. 3; mainelobsterfestival.com)

Surf lotsahelpinghands.com, a free service that helps family and friends coordinate the caregiving tasks of a loved one in need. Through an easy-to-use group calendar, members can sign up for available tasks or check commitments—though the service’s e-mail reminder system will make sure you don’t forget.

Eat Bissinger’s gummy pandas. These award-winning treats come in flavors like green tea/ spiced peach, pomegranate/white tea and blueberry acai. Packed with antioxidants, these snacks are a healthy upgrade for your sweet tooth ($13.50 for a one-pound bag; bissingers.com).

Buy “The River Cottage Family Cookbook.” With more than 100 recipes and kitchen projects, this attractive book helps kids understand the importance of local, organic, seasonal and humanely raised food (Ten Speed Press. $32.50).