It's Friday afternoon and there's little chance you're interested in another probing, insightful blog post, so how about a little satire from McSweeney's instead?

To: AIG Executives
From: AIG Corporate Security
Subject: Updated Security Notification

Due to a growing sense of public attention fueled by increased media scrutiny, AIG Corporate Security would like to highlight certain protective measures all employees can take in order to increase their overall safety and security. This memorandum is specifically tailored toward our top-level executives, and contains information unavailable to regular AIG employees.

• Be mindful at all times of your surroundings, especially if you are surrounded by a large group of very angry people you do not recognize. These are taxpayers.

• Be smart! In a "fight or flight" situation, it is almost always best to retreat. Do not take unnecessary risks. For many of you, this will be impossible.

Read the rest here.

All Dug Up and Nowhere to Go: U.S. farm exports are feeling the recession's squeeze this year, a big shift for farmers who benefited from the rest of the world's perfect storm last year. While agricultural land prices in the States have remained solid (as we learned here a couple of weeks ago), the dollar's rise and world demand's slump have cut both the volume and the price of food exports--prompting worries that 45,000 jobs could be lost.

Untouchable Engines of Growth: India's legions of Mushahar, or untouchables, may be the very folks keeping the country's economy from falling into the global recession pit, the WSJ says. Investments in rural states in recent years have equipped "Old India" to buoy stalling growth in new sectors like information technology and securities trade.

Nukes and Terrorism, So 2008: Pentagon officials held the first-ever war game to prep for economic warfare, the Politico reports. Rather than bullets and bombs, the military brass--and their guests from the finance world--played out scenarios involving dollar dumps and gas prices. Think you can guess which country came out on top...?

It's Not Me, It's You: New data on the ongoing export slump in China has reopened debate over how much the slowdown is externally driven versus homegrown. According to researchers at the Hong Kong Monetary Authority, the effects of the export sector are even bigger than they appear, and growing over time.